Sometimes, as we have all done, I realize I made a gigantic mistake. Now I mistakes just like anyone else.
Now I recently realized that I really like this guy, let's call him Tyrone. He has been a friend for about a year now. Tyrone is wonderful, sweet, kind, caring, funny, and adorable. There were many reason to not be with him as more than a friend for the past year. Eventually these all melted away. Now I am pretty sure I do not love him, but I know when I look at him, he makes me smile.
Tyrone is dating someone else. We talked about it last night. He is such a wonderful man and I am happy for him. However I will not lie, I did tell him that if they break up, I want to try this for real.
Tyrone knew that I liked him, but knew that I was having trouble with it. I was having trouble with it for one reason, Andrew. Although I love that man more than I care to admit, Andrew is the reason why I did not tell Tyrone sooner. Andrew does not like Tyrone, even though Andrew has only met Tyrone once, about 9 months ago.
Now Andrew has seen me date some very horrific men. I am not the best judge of character sometimes when it comes to men that I date. However the reasons behind Andrew not liking Tyrone are non-circumstantial,they do not matter anymore.
Tyrone is a man that never makes fun of me, unless I already making fun of myself. He makes me laugh, he has never threatened or actually hit me, never hurt me in any form. He encourages me when I am down, and rejoices with me when I am happy. He is generous without me asking for it, never expects anything in return, kisses me with passion that I do not think that I have ever felt before. He opens doors for me, compliments me a lot and most importantly makes me laugh.
Last Friday 3/25 I took him to Disneyland with my bff Kim. She loved him. Thought he was the best guy ever. She couldn't understand why we are not together. This past Friday we went to Disneyland with my bff Kim and her hubby and son, I have a season pass to Disneyland-I don't think I have mentioned it. Her husband gave the stamp of approval.
Now I guess I sit back and wait to see what happens with everything in my life. I am letting it go. If it's real, it will come back to me someday, right? One can only hope...
EDIT: I really did not know if I was going to post this particular blog entry. I sat on it for almost a month. However this guy is one of the reasons why I haven't been posting as much. I am a down in the dumps about him. So what is a girl supposed to do? Sit around and pine for him? Well I tried that. It sucks. So instead I am taking charge of my life and put myself out there. What is the worst that can happen? I discover he really ISN'T the one for me?